Yup – I Did It Again
Every six months or so, I do it. I’m about as regular as a T.O. outburst at this point. What am I talkin’ about? Glad ya asked. While preparing dinner the other night, I accidentally cut two of my fingers. The one finger cut was more like a paper cut – hurt like hell, bled quite a bit, but not too serious. However, I cut a decent sliver off of my other finger, and that sucker bled for a few hours – probably should’ve gone to the hospital, but that’s not my style (mainly, because I’m scared shitless of hospitals). So, now I find it difficult to type, and can’t play my guitar for at least a little while. This is a vicious cycle for me – I cut my finger, then I become very careful in the kitchen for a little while, and then I end up becoming careless again … so in about June, I should be ready for another finger-cutting.
Yup – He Did It Again
Just like me, Ric Flair seems to be regular. However, he doesn’t cut his fingers while preparing dinner … or at least he doesn’t talk about doing this. Nope – he’s regular in that he gets married, and then ends up getting divorced shortly after. I think the number for him now is 5 ex-wives. This got me to thinking – shouldn’t there be a three-strike rule with regards to marriages? After your third divorce, shouldn’t your right to marry be revoked, just for the sake of saving you the time and trouble from being moronic more times?
Yup – She Did It Again
I’m not really that concerned about celebrity gossip, but I had to chuckle when I heard that Nicole Ritchie was arrested for driving the wrong way on a highway (in the car-pool lane, no less). I think she should probably be put down at this point, for the good of … well, everybody. Apparently, when she was pulled over …. AT 4:50 AM … she confessed to have taken Vicodin AND smoking weed. She weighed in at a “svelte” 85 pounds at the time, by the way. Lionel must be thrilled with the publicity that his retarded daughter is getting. The good news is that if she dies, they can probably bury her in a shoebox (of course, I don’t wish that on anybody … except Barry Bonds).