Many of you may know my issues with work place restrooms – the main issue being that I just don’t find them “private” enough when I have to “drop some rope.” I get severe stage-fright when somebody else walks in while I’m “hangin’ bananas.” My solutions to this problem would probably be costly – basically making each stall it’s on “room” with walls from the floor to the ceiling. Additionally, I’d like to have some sort of white noise in the background to help drown out the grunts and other sounds. But, that’s not really what I’m blogging about today.
I really wish that my company would find a way to provide reading materials in the stalls – now I’m not asking to have newspapers on top of the tank, but I did see a pretty cool idea in a restaurant restroom a little while ago. Specifically, this establishment puts newspaper pages on a wall behind a plastic cover in front of the urinals, giving us the opportunity to catch up on some world events as opposed to just staring at the urine going down the drain.
Couldn’t this be done in the stalls at work? How difficult would this be to do? I’m not asking for a flatscreen monitor on the door of the stall – all I’m asking for is to put new reading material up once a day, or once a week, or something like that. When I worked at Lockheed, I always enjoyed when somebody left the sports section behind in a stall – this would be kind of like that, but I wouldn’t have to worry about who’s hands were touching the paper previously.
Think about it – we could get creative with this, by having one stall dedicated to the sports section, another stall for entertainment, yet another for world news, and so on. Couldn’t this work? Just have the cleaning person replace the old news with new news when he/she is cleaning the toilets? I don’t think this would cost much more, would it? One of the “lesser publicized” benefits would be that people would no longer have to put a newspaper in their armpits on the way to “drop a deuce.”
On another tangent, maybe we could do something creative with the urinals – like having pee races, kind of like what is done with water guns at carnivals – have a line of cars that race their way to the top of the bathroom, and have this directly related to how much urine is released into the urinal. Tell me this wouldn’t be fun?