Thursday, September 11, 2008

What Will They Think of Next?

I think reality tv shows have hit an all-time low. I know, I know, I blogged about this about a year ago – and truthfully, I thought they’d come up with everything … until last night. I was laying in bed, relaxing after a hectic weekend (translation, bachelor party). My wife came into bed, basically trying to annoy me, and not allowing me to get any of that well-deserved rest that I had earned.

My wife then informed me that she only had about ½ hour left to get on my nerves before her show came on. “What show,” I stated, half interested (for some ungodly reason). My wife proceeded to inform me that she was watching a show called “Sunset Tan,” which basically is a reality show about a tanning salon. I was speechless … but I shouldn’t have been surprised. I think my wife has watched every single reality show at least once.

This got me to thinking – what other ridiculously stupid occupations can a reality show be made for? Here’s a couple, just off the top of my head:

• The Bait ‘n Tackle Chronicles – A show that takes places in … well … a bait and tackle shop … fishermen come in and get bait, and come back and tell stories about the one that got away … meanwhile, the owners of the bait and tackle shop constantly make fun of the choices in bait, lures, and fishing attire … I figure the VS. channel would be a prime candidate for this beauty.
• Brilliant Barbers – I know, I know … there’s already a show (or 30) about hair stylists … but what about a reality show in a good old-fashioned barber shop, complete with a wooden Indian, and one of those swirly signs? The barbers would have their regulars who come in, and update us on their drinking, flatulence, and boring work stories … meanwhile, the barbers make fun of the hairstyles (or lack thereof) these “regulars” have. Probably a gimme for Spike TV.
• Fast Food Free For All – Why not have a competition, not unlike Iron Chef, but featuring fast food restaurants … once and for all, we’d get a definitive answer on whether or not the Big Mac is better than the Whopper, or whose fries are better … How can this miss? Sounds like a perfect show for Fox.
• Dancing with the Chefs – Let’s mix two highly rated reality shows and see what happens. We get world-renowned chefs and have them compete in a dance-off … heck, we could even have Simon Cowell as a judge. Perfect for just about any tv station.

That’s really all I could come up with … with about 5 minutes of thought. What do you guys and gals think?


Jeff said...

Coming soon (I am NOT making this up!): Hulk Hogan's Celebrity Championship Wrestling.

There really should be a Stuff White People Like reality show. Contests could include: who has the lowest salary-per-degree ratio; who belongs to the most grocery co-ops; whose religion is most different from his parents'; who owns the most retro-looking t-shirt.

Meanwhile, some less serious ideas:
* Beer Factor.
* Charles Manson Family Jewels.
* CNBC's The Real World, where Art History majors from the MTV show interview for real jobs with venture capital firms. Facial piercings encouraged!
* Hugh Hefner: My Life in the D-Cup. Pay-per-view version of the more famous show (not the one starring Kathy Griffin).
* Project Runway 747. Drama queens forced to make split-second, life-or-death decisions. And the uniforms are NOT fierce.
* Punkass'd. Ashton Kutcher moves to Compton.
* Road Rules: Lancaster. High-strung urban hipsters get stuck in traffic behind Amish buggies in mushroom country.
* Survivor: Laogai. Starring felons, journalists, and freedom advocates; featuring organ "doctors" and mobile "ambulances." Contestants arrive by tank.

The Rev said...

Once I saw Fox's new show "Hole in the Wall", I knew they had run out of ideas.

sirgeb said...

what's even worse- is that they stole 'hole in the wall' from Japan! even THAT wasn't an original ideal.

El Padrino said...

dud e you have no clue
that's all that's on TV

check out MTV, which is now Reality TV and check out VH! which also used to play music videos but now just plays reality shows

E channel
i could go on

some of them are awesome though

Kristin said...

I think the bottom of the barrel was "The Swan" or maybe, "How Clean Is Your House?"

I mean, really, a show where they show a dirty house and then clean it up... that's like my daily life... snore.

-B- said...

Jeff - that was one of your best posts ever! Yeah, I'd watch all of Los and Jeff's shows, they sound hilarious!! They have to be better than that clean house one, sheesh!

Hey Los - Fox has a reality network!

The End is near!!!!