Tuesday, April 01, 2008

What Do I Say?

I love my job … I really do. I love just about everything about it. Two things, however, are “opportunity areas” for me (by the way, opportunity areas is a nice way my company describes problems/issues). The first is the 40-minute drive – it’s not overly terrible, and heck, I’ve had longer drives to other jobs. BUT, with gas prices rapidly marching to $4.00 a gallon, it is becoming more of an issue than it should.

The second, and probably easier to solve “opportunity area,” is the security guard in the lobby of my building. No, I don’t have any major issue with the guy – in fact, he seems to be pretty cool. But, first, I have no idea what his name is, and he’s been there at least 8 months. I say hello to him every day, and chat with him briefly at least 2-3 times a day. At this point, it is nearly impossible for me to ask him what his name is. It would certainly make me look like an ignorant ass-clown (at least I think it would). I’m pretty sure he knows my name, because he’s the security guard, and anytime someone walks through the door with his/her id badge, the name comes up on the computer.

But, it goes further than that. I’ve run out of things to talk to him about. Sadly, the brief conversations are usually around the weather, and around how close the weekend is. Now, I hate to talk about the second “topic,” mainly because I really don’t hate my job (sure, I’m always looking forward to the weekend, but not THAT much). However, I’m always finding myself asking this guy, “Hey, is it Friday yet?” My teeth grind together every time I say this phrase. He’s probably sick of it as well – you know, he’s probably blogging about me being such an ass for asking him if it’s Friday, or how many hours until 4:00.

With previous security guards, I was able to talk sports, movies, tv, or anything else. Conversations were easy to start up, and I know I brought more value to the table than telling the guy that it’s unseasonably cold this morning. I’m not sure about any of this security guard’s likes or dislikes, and I’m not sure I want to know. But, seriously, I gotta be able to create more small talk with this guy than the current repository I am employing. So, if any of you have suggestions, please let me know … for my sanity, and the security guard’s …


Jeff said...

Commutes are overrated. Haven't seen anything new at my company for you lately ...

You could always ask someone else what the guard's name is. Or search Security in the company directory.

Why don't you crack out one of your famous lines, such as "I'm so busy at work, I don't even have time ..."?

Seriously, if you need topic ideas, go to the Stuff White People Like website.

The Stevo in H-Town said...

los, my man...Ya gotta keep in mind that this is a SECURITY GUARD yer tryin' to converse with...not some genius or potential talk-show host..

Yer better off talkin' to Pac-Man Jones inna scrip-joint...

-B- said...

Is there any reason that you HAVE to talk to this guy at all? If so, then try one of your areas of expertise on him - local sports teams. Or Lederhosen. One of the two should do the trick.

El Padrino said...

i loathe meaningless conversations
i wouldnt even talk to the guy
fuck em

he probably dont want to talk to you either

truth hurts brother

sirgeb said...

use a different door to enter/leave the building from now on.

Superstar said...

conversations with the guard? Why? It must be an east coast thing...LOL

I mean Im all about being friendly...but is sounds like your trying to be his new best friend?

Isn't the law of supply that prices go down when there is surplus??? ~shakes head~ Gas prices....
Ill give you gas!!! hahahahha!

Baroness von Bloggenschtern said...

I can only give ideas from a woman's chit-chat perspective:

"Cute shoes!". "Did you do your hair differently today?". "Could you believe who got booted off ANTM?".

Not so helpful.

Weather always works...for about 10 seconds.

Lisa said...

How bout them Sixers? What's for lunch? Tackle any bad guys lately? How ya like the new Heino single?


Los said...

Jeff - I found out he reads weird books with old English grammar ... can't relate to that.

Stevo - Good point, but he does seem rather smart ... like that security guard in that Seinfeld episode.

B - Because I'm a nice guy ...

ElP - Eh, he likes me ... everybody likes me.

Sir Geb - Really only one entrance, sadly.

Superstar - Nah, I just feel I need to make conversation.

Baroness - Thanks for stopping by! I don't think I'll be telling this guy how nice his shoes are ... but thanks for the suggestions.

Babs - Tackling bad guys????