Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Wacky News Stories

Caught a couple of trout on bass lures a few weeks ago ... yes, I'm proud of myself!

1. On Gasoline prices, on the rise for more than three weeks, potentially topping all-time highs by Memorial Day:
"Thank goodness it's happening during Memorial Day, because with that kind of news, I'm going to need a vacation ..."

2. On a teenager using a candle to search for his dog igniting a fire that destroyed his house:
"That story is a dog-gone shame ... hey-yo!"

3. On an Oregon mailman being suspended for defecating in a yard on his route:
"Talk about special delivery!"

4. On a Scottish butcher laying claim to 'the world's hottest sausage:'
"No word yet on a potential grievance filed by the estate of the late Johnny Holmes..."

5. On a study finding diet plus exercise is more effective for weight loss than either method alone:
"Next thing they'll tell me is that there is no Easter Bunny ... or that Marv Albert wears a tupee."


Jeff said...

1. Change we can believe in.

2. Hot diggity dog.

3. Man bites dog.

4. Groundskeeper Willie has a surprise under his kilt.

5. Yet another study so obvious, it must have been taxpayer-funded.

5a. Marv Albert wears a toupee? YESSSSSSSSSSS!

Jeff said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
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