Some issues with Facebook

I'm a Facebooker ... I'm not ashamed to admit it. I enjoy it. I've reconnected with quite a few friends that I lost touch with for one reason or another. I enjoy some of the trivia games, surveys, and I've even fooled around with Yo-Ville for a while. But, as much as I love Facebook, there is one thing I have issues with. Specifically, it's people who post about absolutely nothing. Look, I get it - the point of Facebook is to update people with what you're currently doing. But, some Facebookers take this to the extreme, unfortunately. Let me give you some examples of bad Facebook updates:

"NAME is enjoying the day." - Really? Do you feel the need to post up basic dreck like this? Seriously? You want to inform people that you are enjoying the day? This is what you want people to know? Do you think other Facebookers are sitting on pins and needles wondering how you feel about today? Do me a favor, and don't post this.

"Name just got home from work." - Oh man, I was hoping you got home from work. I would've spent the entire night laying in bed, pondering if you had indeed made it home from work, or if you just decided to screw it and spend the entire night at work. Now I can sleep peacefully.

"Name just had dinner." - Oh man, no I know your dinner routine - thank goodness. I probably won't call you anyway, but if I did, I know what time I shouldn't call you, because you'll probably be having dinner. Phew! Thank goodness you posted this.


Seriously, it sounds like some Facebookers need help ... and I'm here to give it to them. Really, there is only one rule - make it funny. That's it. Sweet, and simple.

For instance, try this on:

"Name just sunk your battleship." - Funny, short, and sweet. Probably has numerous meanings.

"Name smells of rich mahogany." - It's a movie quote. They work great. But, don't use any Steel Magnolia references.


This should help you get started.