Friday, December 04, 2009

Weird News

It didn't take long for the Tiger Woods jokes to start flying around - my favorite one was this: "Tiger crashed into a fire-hydrant, flew through the windshield, hit a tree, and landed 3 inches from the cup."

1. On a British town that has started wrapping its lightposts up in thick wool sweaters so drunken students don't hurt themselves when they walk into them.
"Florida State is jealous!"
http://news.scotsman.com/latestnews/What-have-you-never-seen.5866935.jp

2. On a couple that got married in a Best Buy line on Black Friday.
"I hope the store put wool sweaters up on the lightposts in the parking lot!"
http://www.wfie.com/Global/story.asp?S=11581152

3. On a University that's looking to hire someone to research lap dances.
"They've collected just under a billion applications so far."
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/howaboutthat/6670653/Leeds-University-advertises-for-lap-dance-research-officer.html

4. On a woman accused of calling in a bomb threat to Miami International Airport with the alleged intention of delaying her boss' flight:
"Either this boss is giving this secretary really good bonuses, or this secretary is dumber than a box of rocks."
http://www.wsvn.com/news/articles/local/MI137485/

5. On a grumpy Santa getting the boot for being so miserable he left children in tears during an appearance at a festive lights switch-on.
"I guess he wasn't in the most "tree-mendous" of moods ... get it?"
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1231379/Bad-Santa-Frosty-Father-Christmas-gets-heave-ho-putting-children-tears.html

3 comments:

Four Dinners said...

I totally deny I ever walked into a lampost in said town.

The lampost intentionally stepped in front of me!

Steph said...

Those lamp posts will get ya. And who in the heck would get married in a store on Black Friday.

Jeff said...

The police asked Tiger’s wife how many times she hit him. She said, “I don’t know exactly, but put me down for a 5.”