My God ... 100 degrees! Is there anything more to say?
1. On a mother and a daycare teacher trying desperately to free a 15-month-old baby boy from a locked car in the scorching heat Monday after emergency services refused to send help:
"Hmmmph ... looks like 911 has even outsourced their services overseas ..."
2. On a quarrel between occupants of two vehicles at a McDonald's restaurant drive-through in southern Finland erupting in gunfire Tuesday, leaving three men dead:
"Guess we can't really laugh at that 'Give me back that Filet-o-Fish' commercial anymore, can we?"
3. On a Porn star offering oral sex to Twitter followers if Dutch win World Cup:
"What happens if the Germans win?"
4. On a fire at a New Hampton telemarketing office causing minor damage:
"See, this is where you wish the 911 operators would refuse to assist ..."
5. On a man who was arrested for masturbating in the electronics department at Walmart: