Wednesday, July 21, 2010

Wacky News Stories

I'm melting ... I'M MELTING!!!

1. On a of a FedEx tractor-trailer rig choking on some spicy pork rinds, losing control of his truck on an interstate and jackknifing it before coming to a stop in a muddy ditch:
"Gives a whole new meaning to the term 'What can brown do for you ...'"

2. On a man getting a DUI whilst riding a lawn mower:
" I thought the concrete was getting a bit long ..."

3. On an argument over butter in a macaroni and cheese recipe turning into violence between a brother and sister:
"Gives a whole new meaning to the term, 'I can't believe it's not butter!'"

4. On unwelcome feral cats being spotted at Bush library site:
"They claimed they smelled something fishy ..."

5. On an Iowa teen wearing a bubble gum wrapper dress to prom:
"I'm hoping those aren't Big League Chew wrappers ..."


Steph said...

Our neighbor got a DUI on his lawnmower. He's a real classy guy. ;)

Heff said...

Mowing under the influence, lol.

paige said...

Except the drunk part, that sounds like my dad. He cuts the grass (and everything else in sight) twice a week. All year.

Life with Kaishon said...

Oh my goodness.
LOVED this Los!
I haven't seen you in a while and I definitely miss coming over! My Thursdays aren't the same unless I stop over for a visit! : )

Ink and Stone said...

Ugh, pork rinds. They would choke anything.

Jeff said...

1. (In my best Homer Simpson voice:) Hmmm ... road pork ... hmmm.

2. Those 2 gnomes are actually our neighbor's son Billy.

3. I'm sure they kissed an made up.

4. Cats at the Clinton library were seen copulating.

5. Did her boyfriend get a DUI for "mowing the lawn" that night?