Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Wacky News Stories

Rolling Stones re-releasing Exile on Main Street with 10 unreleased songs .... good times indeed!!!

1. ON a report that most Americans -- and most American Catholics -- think Pope Benedict XVI has done a bad job of dealing with the problem of sexual abuse by Catholics priests:
"In other news, the sun will come out tomorrow ..."
http://edition.cnn.com/2010/US/04/16/catholic.church.abuse.poll/

2. On a shoe shiner being arrested for burning down rival stands:
"That guy is such a 'heel.'"
http://gothamist.com/2010/04/15/shoe_shiner.phphttp://gothamist.com/2010/04/15/shoe_shiner.php

3. On Police arresting a New Jersey man after he was accused of intentionally vomiting on a young girl at the Phillies game Wednesday evening:
"Hmmph ... this Eagles fan must've been lost."
http://cbs3.com/local/Philadelphia.Phillies.Matthew.2.1636036.html

4. On an animal hypnotist claiming to be the country's first "rabbit whisperer:"
"Elmer Fudd thinks this guy is a genius."
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/howaboutthat/7589936/Animal-hypnotist-is-Britains-first-rabbit-whisperer.htmlwhisperer

5. On the Ben Roethlisberger scandal:
"Man, now I wish McNabb drank more!"
http://content.usatoday.com/communities/gameon/post/2010/04/eye-opener-1-2/1

2 comments:

Heff said...

I think the Pope's Been-a-Dick.

Four Dinners said...

Rolling Stones re-releasing Exile on Main Street with 10 unreleased songs .... good times indeed!!!

You said it in one old bean!

1. ON a report that most Americans -- and most American Catholics -- think Pope Benedict XVI has done a bad job of dealing with the problem of sexual abuse by Catholics priests:

Isn't he that German chap who was in the SS?

2. On a shoe shiner being arrested for burning down rival stands:

10 out of 10 for ingenuity I'd say. Must have only taken 1 match per stand.

3. On Police arresting a New Jersey man after he was accused of intentionally vomiting on a young girl at the Phillies game Wednesday evening:

Well at least he was making sure nobody stepped in it...very thoughtful I'd say.

4. On an animal hypnotist claiming to be the country's first "rabbit whisperer:"

Apparently, latest news is he's been eaten by a Fox....

5. On the Ben Roethlisberger scandal:

Only scandal I can see is how unpronouncable his name is