Happy Turkey Day all, and make sure you keep your cool whilst Christmas shopping!!!
1. On plans under way to memorialize Billy Carter's gas station.
"Can a Mr. Whipple Charmin statue be far behind?"
2. On three sex-starved women kidnapping an 18-year-old man and forcing him to be intimate with one of them at a cathedral.
"Man, my stories from when I was 18 pale in comparison sadly."
3. On a woman receiving monthly insurance checks because she claimed she is too depressed to work, getting cut-off by her insurance company because she posted pictures of herself smiling in a bikini on the beach on Facebook.
"I'm really surprised at Sarah Palin for this one ..."
4. On a brain expert who says that concentration on computers in schools is a waste of time and money and calling for a return to books.
"Books in school? Really?"
5. On Pittsburgh planning to tax college students.
"Wait, don't they already have a tax on alcohol?"