Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Wacky News Stories

I saw some Robins ... which means that Spring is right around the corner ... right?

1. On a woman who sues a doctor because he gave her an extra set of breasts.
"I guess somebody needs to be held 'a-cow-ntable' ... wait, that was an 'utterly' terrible joke!"
http://www.ecanadanow.com/curiosity/2010/03/04/woman-sues-over-botched-boob-job-doc-adds-two-more-breasts/

2. On a man who is suing an airline for not looking at his scrotum:
"Either this guy has a lot of "balls" or he's just plain "nuts!"
http://cnews.canoe.ca/CNEWS/Canada/2010/03/05/13132366-qmi.html

3. On an undercover cop who spent nearly $17,000 on more than 130 lap dances, and didn't make a single arrest:
"Looks like this cop is going to be introduced to a different form of a 'pole dance.'"
http://www.seattlepi.com/local/416240_RICKS04.html

4. On an AIG employee saying the following on the possibility of losing his blood money: "To be honest with you, I really hope it blows up. I think the U.S. taxpayer deserves to lose a trillion dollars over this thing for the way they have behaved:"
"Maybe we can relocate these people ... to Afghanistan."
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2010/03/03/AR2010030303764.html

5. Man banned from all Wal-Marts for life because he refused to show his receipt to a door greeter:
"Really? What kind of stand was this knucklehead trying to make by not showing his receipt? Was he buying tampons or something?"
http://consumerist.com/2010/03/why-was-i-banned-from-walmart-for-not-showing-my-receipt.html

7 comments:

Realliveman said...

I'm loving these posts!

Wacky is as wacky does!

Heff said...

Banned from Wal-Mart ? One could be so lucky.

Four Dinners said...

By the time I'd worked my way through an extra set of tits and bleeding balls I had to retire for more vodka...it is entirely your fault I am drinking too much...;-)

I will now reconvene....

Four Dinners said...

3. I've always fancied being an undercover cop. Even more now!!!

4. 'Earth callng?'...Hello? Anyone in? The lights are on...

5. I have no idea what a 'door greeter is. I don't think I really want to know. I was once banned from Sainsburys. I won't say here I think I'll post it...

sirgeb said...

You can 'milk' gags out of your first story until the cows come home.

Jeff said...

1. Did her husband leave a good tip?

2. Probably got "sacked" from his last job.

3. He should be arrested -- for paying over $125 per lap dance.

4. Rules and taxes are for the little people.

5. Of all the things to get banned for ... what a douche.

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