Sad week ... Legendary movie icon Corey Haim dies, then Teleflora salesman extraordinaire Merlin Olsen passes ... who's next, Mr. Belvedere?
1. On the recent study that long-time smoking reduces your chances of getting Parkinson's Disease:
"It also reduces the risk of living long enough to get Parkinson's Disease."
2. On one of the founding members of "Ben and Jerry's" ice cream getting married in an ice-cream parlor:
"I'm glad some news reporter was able to get this 'scoop.'"
3. On a robber holding up 11 people, and making off with $6 in cash:
"Probably not a scenario that CSI or Unsolved Mysteries would want to tackle."
4. On a chef who concocted cheese made from his wife's breast milk:
"I think the only thing I can say about that chef is ... what a boob!"
5. On the death of Corey Haim:
"Looks like there may be a sequel in the works to 'The Lost Boys.'"