Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Weekly Homework Assignment

It's time once again for Mama Kat's weekly homework assignment.


I chose the following prompt: "Share an interesting email exchange you've had with someone lately." I chose to modify this prompt a little ... ya see, I have a fantastic e-mail conversation that I saved between me and my good friend Ray-Ray. I had this on an old website, and copied and pasted it here.


A hysterical E-mail conversation between Ray and I on July 18, 2001:

Los: Thank goodness that I don't have any more classes to take at Great Valley, so I won't feel the pinch.

Ray: Yep, that would suck. on a side note, i shit my pants this morning.

Los: Was it while you were at the track? I hope it wasn't on your way to work.

Ray: yep, at the track. I had a few beers with the umpire guys last night, my dad came up from the shore and had a hoagie for me, so i ate it. watched the end of the phils game and went to bed. get up this morning, follow theusual routine, sit on the pot and wait for things to happen. now, i know i have this hoagie and beer in my system somewhere and i seem to get rid of some of it. i clean up and head to the track. now i'm cruisin along and i'm gettin a little gassy, then things start rumblin and i know what's goin on, this has happened before. i guess all that bouncin shakes things up in the old bowel system, but i've been able to hold off before and finish runnin then go home and take care of business. not today. on my 6th lap i incur "a little accident." had to stop runnin, cut across the football field, saddle up on my bike and get home. i get up on my deck, strip, and things are a mess, and head to the bathroom, walkin kinda funny mind you. clean up, shit again, this time where i'm supposed to, clean up, and get in the shower. ah, finally clean. now i go back outside, get the hose out, and hose down my clothes. it's been quite a morning. i bet my flowers out back come up nice though. good thing it's raining, it'll wash away any debris that might have been left on the driveway.

Los: Now THAT is a funny story. I almost crapped myself reading it.

Ray: Yeah, hilarious. and i'm wearin white compression shorts and white champion shorts to boot, so the brown is just seepin through there like there's no tomorrow. so when i'm on my bike my big ass is in the air, cuz i'm not sitting down in the stuff, that's just gross, and all the cars probably see this big brown stain. lotta fun. i think i'm gonna start wearing diapers

7 comments:

Unknown said...

Just visiting from Mama Kat's. Wow, I can see why you saved that one...that is hilarious! I think that one will be tough to top.

Jay said...

This really happens to people?

El Padrino said...

grown man shitting himself is always a riot

Rhonda said...

Oh. My. God. I'm seriously crying over here!!! I think I'm sending out this link on my facebook profile when I get home! I hope you don't mind... Actually, it doesn't really matter. I'll do it anyway!! lol

Thanks so much for the laugh!!

kisatrtle said...

I think Ray is going to kick your butt for posting this...LOL too funny

Jen said...

people pooping themselves and me not having to clean it up it always funny.
(in case you are wondering I am a mommy and a RN poop is my life.)

snowelf said...

I should NOT have read this at work. Too funny!!! Definitely one of the funniest emails I have ever read--that's for sure!!

--snow