Wednesday, June 23, 2010

Wacky News Stories

Thank goodness for air-conditioning!!!!

1. On incidents of drunkenness plummeting since Budweiser became the only alcohol available at the World Cup:
"See, I knew the South Africans had good taste!"

2. On a man being jailed for making a bubble with his gum in court:
"BP is considering using this as a solution for the gulf oil mess ..."

3. On Joran van der Sloot's Mom claiming her son is not a murderer:
"Oh, I didn't realize she had another son besides Joran ..."

4. On a man calling 911 because the stripper he ordered off of Craigslist was too old:
"Looks like we have another great candidate for congress!"

5. On a report that pot smoking can worsen schizophrenia:
"In an unrelated report, lots of drinking can worsen driving ..."


Jeff said...

1. Bud: the solution to South Africa's violence problems.

2. Does this make Farting in Court a capital offense?

3. Her son is a manslaughterer?

4. Bitch set me up.

5. Is it the pot or the Doritos?

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